Hmmm. Well at least I know SH was out of the game before it started....

Strange how my friend's sadness about his attempt at going out with someone has gone badly. And he turned to SH, the JK-look alike, to get some support. Sigh. Than again, they're helping each other out. I just wonder about SH. I have one of 3 options. Should I believe again and make a leap of faith? Or should I not believe and try anyhow just to see how it goes? Or not bother at all especially since there is a lack of support of any serious interest by both sides. Option 2 has quite a bit of appeal simply because I get to investigate somewhat what it would have been like to be with JK, even though it isn't. I wonder if my friend realizes the inherent spookiness of SH due to her strong JK-likeness.

I guess I'm also irritated today about pay and today's meeting this morning when I got asked questions I asn't sure what the answers were.

Two things:

In an earlier post, I mentioned how Boa's video Atlantic Princess was reminding me of Australia and Melbourne in particular. Except it turns out the video was shot in Sydney's CBD. Oops. Didn't realize AMP would have that many big office towers in Sydney. At least I got the right country.

The second things was that I was having this chat with someone I met about a decade ago (give or take a week). And we were talking about traditions. Well I know one tradition that really isn't around any more, at least in the same way it used to be. The UofT UC Union's afternoon tradition of serving cookies and tea for UC students (well, even Trin people went as well) is now just a memory. Yeah though it looks like they serve the cookies and tea, all the comfy furniture and tables are gone. Tea is served out of something from a catering event, one of those big plastic containers holding hot water and tea instead of teapots. Plus it looked like they used plastic cups too. On top of it looks like a cafeteria, complete with cash register, cold drinks and food for those in rez on the meal plan. Sigh, it's where I ran into her the most.

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I had to say it. Even though it means nothing now.

This seems to focus the rage....:

Celine Dion - One Heart

You can run and you can begin'
In a place where you don't fit in
Love will find a way ...yeah

When you're down, you can start again
Turn around and you think you're in
Love will find a place yeah

If you got one heart you are followin'
One dream keeps you wondering
Love lights your way through the night
One wish keeps you tryin'
Once your silver lining
Loves lights your way through the night

You can fall a thousand time
You can feel like you've lost your mind
Love will find a way oh yeah yeah
In a minute it can change your life
In a moment it can make you right
Love will find a place yeah

If you got one heart you are followin'
One dream keeps you wondering
Love lights your way through the night
One wish keeps you tryin'
Once your silver linin'
Loves lights your way through the night

Everybody needs something to hold on to
Everybody needs something to hold on to
if you got one heart you are followin'
one dream keeps u wondering
love lights your way through the night
One wish keeps you tryin'
once your silver linin'
Loves lights your way through the night

One wish keeps you tryin'
Once your silver linin'
Loves lights your way through the night

Love will find a way
Love will find a way in your heart

One ring to rule them all, one ring to find them one ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them

One of my friends said the one of the strangest things today. She thought that I liked CS way back when even though I always thought (and still do) are reminded of her as one of the Greek myths of the Sirens. What can say about a really physically beautiful girl that's very high maintenance and whose dream is to marry rich so she can not have to work and spend her day shopping at Holt Renfrew. Or who endeavours to be cool, snobbish and popular - how cold. A personality like that is something I quite despise. I think if I were to reencounter this Siren, although tempting is might be, I would not fall under the spell of this Siren. No short term gain for long term pain for me. No ball and chain for me.

Hmm. Been thinking of JK again. Strangely I hadn't been thinking of her until someone else carelessly mentioned her today. Argghh! I hate having her in my head. I hate the illogic of it all. I hate the fact she has this perpetual hold over me.

It's not logical to like someone you barely know. It's not logical that she would like you for the same reason. It's not logical even when you're pretty sure the two of you are similar in many ways. It's not logical when the two of you are different in some other significant ways - the kind that you likely can't reconcile.

I just want to forget. Even though it's approraching the 10th anniversary of when I first reencountered her. It has been nothing but misery.